Archive for July, 2009
A perfect example of how wingnuts exemplify strident ignorance
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 10, 2009
This should do it:
A new poll shows that President Obama continues to have high job approval ratings in New Hampshire.
The latest University of New Hampshire poll shows that 61 percent of the adults polled say they approve of the job Obama is doing, 33 percent disapprove and 6 percent are neutral. The figures are similar to his national ratings in a recent Gallup poll.
The poll reached 558 randomly selected adults by phone between June 24 and July 1. The margin of sampling error for the survey is plus or minus 4.1 percentage points.
Now look at the comments. In addition to fomenting all sorts of nutty, paranoud bullshit (in the case of “NH,” at least), none of the people who have chimed in to complain about the poll (only three as of this writing) has the slightest fucking clue about either who was polled or what the results mean. “Armyvet” doesn’t understand that a random sampling of 558 people yields he same margin of error no matter what the size of the greater whole. And none of these clowns grasps the fact that the poll was conducted by UNH faculty, not at UNH. They assume that the poll was of college students or was otherwise localized to the NH-MA border (and New Hampshire wingnuts hate Massachusetts) and use this as a basis, though not the only basis, for their tiresome, histrionic bullshit.
Stupid people are little different from mosquitoes. They’ll always be around, and although they are not fundamentally responsible for being the loathsome creatures they are, they’re pests in the extreme who are ideally avoided via physical barriers or some other form of repellent. The excoriating thing is that they manage to figure out how to fuck each other even when they can’t figure out how to exit an 8′ x 8′ room with four walls and an open door. And how they love the Internet! One could make a full-time career out of correcting their misconceptions, lies, distortions, and propagated rumors. Christ with a GED parchment.
AC/DC vs. Angelo Badalamenti
Posted by kemibe in Sounds Cool on July 10, 2009
I’ve seen and heard some strange music-video and straight radio hybrids, but for now this one tops them all. It melds a live AC/DC performance of with footage from David Lynch’s Twin Peaks prequel Fire Walk With Me, and mashes the Australian rockers’ “The Jack” with Angelo Badalamenti’s “The Pink Room.” Somehow, it works. The film was a disappointment but whoever made this extracted some of the best scenes.
I was inspired to track this down after learning that a woman I became good friends with during my recent trip to Boulder graduated from high school with Sheryl Lee, the actress who played Laura Palmer on the Twin Peaks TV series and also starred in FWWM (she’s the blonde in the video).
Warning: There is some, uh, mature content.
Wurth-Thomas 3:59.98 in Rome: U.S. women milers rage on
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 10, 2009
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Christin Wurth-Thomas may not have won the race–no one could touch Maryam Yusuf Jamal tonight–but her 3:59.98 for 1500 meters, which earned her second place in a typically formidable Golden League field, makes her the second American woman to dip under four minutes in 2009, with Jennifer Barringer having run 3:59.90 at the Prefontaine Classic in May.
Remarkably, only two U.S. women ever managed the feat before this year, and one of them (Mary Slaney) tested positive for testosterone later in her career. If one chooses to discard all of Slaney’s performances on that basis, only Suzy Favor Hamilton and her 3:57.40 from nine years ago keep Barringer and Wurth-Thomas from the top two U.S. spots ever. |
Nicole Bobek arrested on meth charges: What is it with women figure skaters?
Posted by kemibe in Catablogic Blathering on July 9, 2009
Nicole Bobek, who won the 1995 U.S. Figure Skating Championship and was a member of the 1998 Olympic team, was arrested on Monday on charges that she had conspired to distribute methamphetamine.
The picture on the left is from 1998, when she represented the United States in Nagano. On the right is her arrest mug shot.
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Bobek is not the only distaff figure skater, foreign or domestic, to run significantly afoul of the law. In 1997, Oksana Baiul, the Ukranian who won Olympic gold in 1994, drunkenly crashed her luxury car into a tree in Connecticut. (Baiul seems to have put that incident far behind her, however.) And few could forget the bizarre 1994 drama involving Tonya Harding, who along with her ex-husband and a couple of other dignitaries was part of a conspiracy to club fellow American skater Nancy Kerrigan on the knee during the U.S. Championships. Harding won that event, while Kerrigan was forced to withdraw; at the subsequent Olympics, however, Harding finished eighth and Kerrigan took the Silver medal. (Kerrigan herself, some will recall, was caught on microphone at a Walt Disney World publicity parade saying, “This is dumb. I hate it. This is the most corniest [sic] thing I have ever done.” Although Disney was her sponsor, she has nothing but high praise from me for implicitly laying into those assholes.)
There must be a message in here somewhere for parents whose daughters express an interest in figure skating. Sure, let them do it, but by all means make sure they suck at it–an unusual number of champions seem to pay a heavy price.
Tsk, tsk: The ignorant public can’t dictate scientific research!
Posted by kemibe in Techies & Technology on July 9, 2009
The shitbirds at OneNewsNow.com, the “news” arm of the American Family Association, are unreal. Actually, they aren’t; their brand of reportage is all over the place, and it’s as if they’re engaged in a contest with Christian Newswire, Focus on the Family, the Family Research Council, the Family Fuckface Association, Focus on the Fuckface, FuckfaceNewsNow.com, and any number of other outlets to see who can make the most noise and the least amount of sense at the same time. The word of the day, every day, is whining.
A recent complaint, titled “Public ignored; full steam ahead for embryonic sacrifice,” exemplifies the fact that Christers’ distaste for a scientific endeavor is usually inversely proportional to their comprehension of its intracacies, and more importantly, its benefits. But the loopiest thing is the chief reason the “article” gives for why ESCR should be squashed: Some folks don’t like it!
The National Institutes of Health has issued guidelines for research on human embryos. One pro-family spokesman accuses NIH of ignoring the public on the matter.
The guidelines, which are based on a presidential executive order, open the door for research that pro-life groups have fought against for years. Dr. David Prentice of the Family Research Council tells OneNewsNow those guidelines set up a system that creates an incentive for embryonic sacrifice. He goes on to say NIH simply did not listen to the public.
“Of the 49,000 comments they got, 30,000 told them not to fund any human embryo research [using federal funds]. The acting director of the NIH said they just ignored those comments,” Prentice notes. “[So] the question wasn’t whether to fund it, but how to go about sacrificing embryos.”
How dare the NIH not allow its policies to be determined by plebiscite!
Prentice adds those figures show America is still strongly pro-life. “And [that] they want our taxpayer funds going towards successful and ethical adult stem-cell research — the stuff that is already helping patients now,” he emphasizes.
Those figures show what everyone knows–that pro-lifers are much more apt to leave comments with the NIH about ESCR than people who favor the research, because the latter have no real reason to opine now that things are slated to go forward. Lying is the stock-in-trade of Jesus fans, and an ABC poll taken two weeks ago underscores this well: 55 percent of Americans surveyed think that abortion should be legal all or most of the time, while only 43 percent believe the opposite. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU LIARS?
Adult stem-cell research, which does not involve killing a tiny human being, is now being used to help more than 70 documented medical conditions and diseases.
If a three-day old blastocyst is a “tiny human being,” what’s in the spooge ten million torqued-up teenagers are presently spilling into their wadded-up socks? Infra-midgets? You can’t parody this sort of shrill yet stoic ignorance.
However, the part about adult stem cells is on target. Of course, an intelligent, honest, and progressive sort would look at this and say, “Well, since ESC’s are like the adult version, only totipotent, they should turn out to be even better sources of treatments and cures!” The God-soaked fuckhead, on the other hand, says, “Well, we have what we need already! None of this killing of cell heaps! Praise Jesus and save the little souls!” It’s well beyond pathetic.
Research on human embryos, in contrast, has produced no useable results.
Maybe if fuckheads for the LORD would back off (their yammering played a major role in GW Bush’s vetoing of federal funding for this kind of research), the undeniable fruits ESCR could be realized. To completely shackle something and then claim it hasn’t done any good is the mark not merely of a stupid person, but an evil person. I hope that unassuming, pro-science, harmless self-described Christians realize that godless people like me have to actively fight the idea that every one of you is as fucked up in the noggin as your self-appointed voices for the faith are. This Prentice guy is beyond the pale.
I really don’t approve of this article at all.
No First Amendment rights for this baby
Posted by kemibe in Hootworthy, Self-Indulgent Wankery on July 9, 2009
Believe it or not, this chunk of map shows the location of the first house I ever lived in. I think we were there for about two-plus years.
Opposite Foot Triplet
Posted by jim in Audio Island, Fun Is Where You Find It, More Art, Then Science, Pattern Juggling on July 8, 2009
Ah, the myriad joys and accidental discoveries of symmetrical drumming. For those who read my continuing meanderings on getting my right side to behave just like my left, today we’re going to talk about triplets. Of course, these wouldn’t be your everyday, garden variety triplets ‘cause we’re too screwy for that here at The Chimp Refuge. No, this is going to be special.
Olympic 1,500 “Gold Medalist” Ramzi’s positive EPO test confirmed
Posted by kemibe in The Running Ape on July 8, 2009
Bahrain 1,500m specialist Rashid Ramzi’s “B” sample from the Beijing Olympics has tested positive, meaning that Kenya’s Asbel Kiprop is now declared the 2008 Olympic Champion.
Ramzi tested positive for CERA, or continuous erythropoietin receptor activator, an advanced version of the classic blood-booster erythropoetin. EPO stimulates the production of red-blood cells, thereby conferring a near-immediate advantage to athletes competing in primarily aerobic events such as distance running and cycling.
When an athlete tests positive for a banned substance, that is considered an “A” sample, and disqualification is contingent on a subsequent positive test of the same sample of blood or urine, but one that has been physically sequestered from the “A” sample to avoid allegations of tampering.
Usain Bolt blasts a wet 19.59 into the wind in Lausanne
Posted by kemibe in The Running Ape on July 8, 2009
Apparently the Jamaican sprint monster who captivated track fans and civilians alike at the 2008 Olympics with a pair of world records in the 100 (9.69) and 200 (19.32) meters hasn’t been spending all of his time since then celebrating and getting in car accdents. Last night, running into a 0.9 m/s headwind in rainy conditions in Lausanne, Switzerland, Bolt blazed a 19.59 in the 200 in what was clearly among the greatest sprint efforts of all time. It was the fourth-fastest wind-legal 200 ever. American Tyson Gay ran 19.58 earlier this year.
To put Bolt’s run in perspective, he won the race by a calamitous 0.82 seconds, and the runner up was a 2008 gold medalist himself–American LaShawn Merritt, stepping down from his customary event of 400 meters.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 7, 2009
I ordinarily balk at any use of the Caps Lock key, but the results of this Gallup poll conducted yesterday were so startling and distasteful that I had to make an exception. You should read it for the complete breakdown, but here’s the skinny:
- 43% of American voters say that they are either very likely or somewhat likely to vote for Sarah Palin for president in 2012, including 72% of Republicans.
- Should Palin not run, 39% of Americans polled say that they would like to see Palin assume a major political role, including 67% of Republicans.
- 70% of voters polled say their opinion of Palin has not changed as a result of her resigning from the Alaska governorship.
- 53% believe the media has treated Palin unfairly.
Well, at least Sarah Palin wrote her own resignation speech
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 7, 2009
Or so it seems clear. Check out the transcript on her official Web site. Had a PR type done the job, it’s doubtful that the document would contain so many gratuitous capital letters (“Ethics Reform,” “Climate Change,” “Outside interests,” and even an erroneously capitalized “Governor”), exclamation points!!!!…and ellipses…plus there were way – too – many – hyphens, and (this is my favorite) she dropped in “yes’s” intended as a plural noun.
Of course, this ignores the content, which is good for some belly laughs. She writes: “People who know me know that besides faith and family, nothing’s more important to me than our beloved Alaska.” Yes, Alaska is so important to her that she was forced to abandon it. Actually, come to think of it, that does make sense, although not in the way Sarah “I’m quitting because only a quitter wouldn’t” Palin believes it does.
As I have written elsewhere, the fact that she is a dolt isn’t the mortifying part; America is filthy with lunkheads. The scary thing is that she has plenty of supporters and defenders, even in small, chiefly liberal states about as far away from Alaska as you can get nd still be in the U.S. I rationalize away my angst over this by assuming that nutballs have a special affinity for the comments sections of newspapers, just as they’re more likely than the average person to write letters to the editor. But I’m not so sure.
Spot the problem!
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 7, 2009
Listen to this short clip of Arizona State Sen. Sylvia Allen and how she justifies uranium mining in her home state.
Suck it up
Posted by kemibe in Techies & Technology on July 6, 2009
My dad likes his toys, and he recently got one of these:
This is nothing more than a vacuum cleaner that operates on its own. It has infrared sensors that instruct the robot to turn as it approaches a wall, and since this doesn’t always work, there’s a large contact-sensing bumper on the front of the disc. Since there are many situations in which you would want the unit to turn even in the absence of a physical barrier (the junction between a carpeted living room and a tile kitchen, for example), the iRobot comes with several transmitters that resemble computer speakers and create a “virtual barrier.” It comes with a docking station for use after cleaning.
Developed through a joint venture between MIT and some entrepreneur, the iRobot (my dad’s is in the “Roomba” series and, given that there’s a Golden retriever in the house, is a pet-specific model) even has a software interface that allows savvy hackers to modify the robot’s behavior to their liking. Over two and a half million models have been sold to date.
Watching the thing in action really does summon forth images of an R2D2 that has been hammered nearly flat by a pile driver or car compactor. All that’s lacking are the beeps and chirps.
Guns don’t kill people, I kill people
Posted by kemibe in Hootworthy on July 5, 2009
You knew that eventually there would be an “MC Vagina”.
An example of Christian meddling suck
Posted by kemibe in Health and Society, The Medical Tent on July 5, 2009
I really don’t have to editorialize any further than I have in the post title. Anyone who doesn’t think that Christopathy doesn’t threaten greater American society need only read this to receive a wake-up call.
The Alliance Defense Fund is seeking permission to intervene in a court decision ordering the Food and Drug Administration to sell the “Plan B” pill to minors.
The Plan B pill, otherwise known as the “morning-after pill,” is a very strong dose the same hormones used in oral contraceptive pills. Some doctors believe it could cause an abortion to an expectant mother. Matt Bowman is an attorney with the Alliance Defense Fund.
“This is a case where pro-abortion activist groups have put their political agenda over the health of minors by attempting to force a court to expose them to a troubling drug,” he contends.
Bowman says there is no research on what potential medical problem the Plan B pill might cause for a minor. He adds that most minors who take the pill do so without parental knowledge.
First. let me say that I understand that groups like this one do not speak for most people who call themselves Christians. Even those who are personally opposed to birth control and drugs like Plan B would not interfere with the rights of others to use them. I’m targeting a particular, and virulent, subset of the flock with these observations.
With that out of the way: The claims made by the Alliance Defense Fund are, as usual, high-octane unadulterated bullshit. First of all, anyone who uses the term “pro-abortion” immediately discredits himself. No one likes abortion. But for a host of well-established reasons, the choice must remain.
As a result of a March court decision, 17-year-olds can buy Plan B over the counter. Girls under 17 can only get a prescription form of the drug, consisting of the synthetic progestin hormone levonorgesterel.
Beyond that, this idea that Plan B “could cause an abortion to an expectant mother” is screamingly incoherent. For one thing, Plan B is not an abortifacient–it prevents implantation from occurring at all. For another, how many expectant mothers–that is, pregnant women who hoped to carry to term–would take this drug? Do men sworn to celibacy seek prescriptions for Viagra?
Then there’s the implicit claim that particular risks to minors are likely to exist. This is asinine. All ovulating females would be expected to react to the same way to this medication. The idea that teenagers would tolerate a dose of Plan B more poorly than older women is nothing but special pleading aimed at achieving he ends of cross-eyed Bible-boppers. Besides, it’s not as though this is a maintenance drug–it’s a one-shot deal, for obvious reasons.
The Alliance Defense Fund is unabashedly interfering in women’s health issues, and doing so with the usual freshets of lies. If its members have an aversion to Plan B, then they can simply not take it, and they can shut the fuck up about what’s supposedly good for everyone else.
Of course, they’ll get nowhere with this from legal standpoint, but it’s the thought–and the intent–that counts. These people are assholes who remind the world of two unyielding truths: Christheads venture into areas where they don’t belong, and Christheads lie with aplomb.
Another grievance about my “Truth Project” post
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 5, 2009
I noted yesterday that some whackjob James Dobson fan (pardon the redundancy) had left a comment to a musty post on the old Refuge at ScienceBlogs. Apparently this was the start of a trend, because today someone else lodged a similar complaint:
I think what I find to be almost humerous about this column is that you continually reference “the trailer”. Have you even opened your mind and hard heart long enough to view the series in its entirety? If you did, I don’t believe there is any way you could make some of the claims that you have. It is “backed up” by scientific FACT, not “expressions of belief” or “whimsical platitudes” as you call them.
My heart literally aches for you because you are so close-minded that I’m afraid you will never allow yourself to see “The Truth”. I pray I’m wrong.AT
Much as it felt strange doing so, I left a comment at ScienceBlogs explaining that we had moved, and that if Chris and AT wished they could repost their comments to the same post that has been imported to this domain if they expected a response. I warned them that I thought they were misguided saps and that the idea of praying for atheists to come around was a rip-roaringly infantile form of antiquated superstition, or words to that effect.
Save this, motherfuckers. For my part I hope (but don’t pray) that the practice of brainwashing youngsters to grow up with a corrupted mentality like those of Chris and AT will one day cease. I also hope I wake up next to a pile of gold worth ten million dollars.
Tips and tricks for self-disenfranchisement
Posted by kemibe in Hootworthy on July 5, 2009
I mean, who hasn’t tried to urinate on someone else’s kids? Or at least wanted to? (On a recent flight from Atlanta to Boston, I wanted to go a step further and toss the six-year-old in the seat next to me clean out of the fucking plane, depressurization issues be damned.)
Also, excellent Nick Nolte reference.
WorldNut Daily: Harry Potter pimping for gay marriage
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 5, 2009
Poor Dumbledore. As if dealing with the cruel machinations of Voldemort weren’t enough, he’s facing an adversary that lives even deeper in fantasyland: the laughably dishonest right-wing online rag WorldNut Daily.
WND has been condemning the Harry Potter novels for years, and now Bob Unruh (whose name alone makes me want to put him in a sealed dumpster and launch him into outer space) is claiming that a passage on the Web site “What would Dumbledore do?” advocates for gay marriage. The offending paragraph?
To accept our reality exactly as it is and want nothing more than that reality is to stand in a place of self-acceptance. To accept oneself as we are right now can happen at this moment, but to accept oneself for a sustained period of time often times takes a lifetime of practice. But make no mistake: there is no higher joy.
Yup–Unruh really uses this as evidence for same-sex-marriage advocacy. Of course, he doesn’t explain how this verbiage relates to gay marriage in any way, shape, or form.
Unruh then states that the Harry Potter franchise has “faced criticism for attacking the Judeo-Christian values on which the United States was built.” (every time I see that canard I want to take a dump on the writer’s welcome mat.) He cites a 2007 WND piece by pathetic young nutjob Ben Shapiro that consists of a breathless tirade about author J.K. Rowling’s revelation that Dumbledore is gay, and also points to WND film critic Ted Baehr’s screechy objection to one of the Potter movies, in which Baehr writes, “Witchcraft means rebellion against God’s authority in the Bible” and asserts that the idea that “you really are a good person” is a “stupid aphorism.”
The take-home message? Homosexuality, witchcraft, and being a good person are unacceptable, and above all, un-American. Thanks for that, you goofy fucks.
I’m sensing a trend in the marathon world
Posted by kemibe in The Running Ape on July 5, 2009
Number of men who have run under 2:08:30 for the marathon so far in 2009: 31
Number of non-Africans in this group: 0
Number of Kenyans: 20
Number of Ethiopians: 6
Number of Moroccans: 3
Number of Eritreans: 1
Number of South Africans: 1
Fastest marathon by an Asian man so far this year: 2:08:30
By a European man: 2:09:53
By a North American man: 2:09:21 (Eritrean-born)
By a South American man: 2:14:46
By an Australian man: 2:12:56
By an Antarctican man: Just yankin’ your chain
Funny comment left on The Chimp Refuge v1.0
Posted by kemibe in We're Doomed on July 5, 2009
The ScienceBlogs version of this site remains online, though Seed has removed all internal links to it. As a result, people occasionally leave comments to posts there, and because those who comment to months-old entries are invariably people who use Google to look for reactions to their Internet bullshit, these comments are invariably left by people taking umbrage at whatever I (or Jim or Doc Bushwell) wrote back in the day.
We’ve imported all of our ScienceBlogs posts, of course, and I invite you to read this. Now read the comment that was just left at ScienceBlogs by one “Chris”:
Lovely column by a person who needs Jesus desperately. Your need to
lash out at people of whom you have never met and know nothing about
shows me that you are unsatisfied with your life regardless of the lies
you tell yourself when you are alone.Your observation that Focus on the Family wants nothing but money has
no basis of “truth” in it whatsoever for someone who claims to have
such a deep acquaintance with it.Your weak attempt to discredit the series by randomly throwing in
divorce rates is interesting. Although a huge percentage of people
claim to be Christians, but a smaller percentage actually admit to
following Christ. I would be more interested in knowing what the
divorce rate among people who walk their faith on a daily basis is
instead of those who proclaim their Christian faith because they are
able to get to services on Easter and Christmas.You say not to call it truth unless it can be backed up. Watch the
series again then and perhaps you will notice the point and the
beginning through the end that is completely devoted TO backing up that
claim. Or by some chance, as unbelievable as this could be, did your
hardened and angry heart look past the truth presented so that you
could just find something to complain about and ridicule?Our teary eyed Jesus wept many times for those he came to save through
his sacrifice on a cross. Those who ridiculed Him and rejected Him as
you are doing now.You have heard the truth, rejecting it is your decision, but ask
yourself if you have attempted to even consider the possibility that it
IS the truth. Your soap box won’t save your soul from Hell.
This guy actually defends Focus on the Family. I used to have sympathy for these deluded, brainwashed fucks who babble on about Hell and salvation and the hardened hearts of atheists, but now I just wish they would either wise up, shut up, or disappear altogether. They are functionally retarded and startlingly charmless. And their parents should be shot. (With dummy bullets, of course, or maybe with squirt guns filled with goat piss.)
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- Doc Bushwell is a biochemist and a medical writer who serves as a slavering minion of the dark lords of Big and Little Pharma; Jim is an engineering professor with a fondness for running shoes and drumsticks; and Kevin Beck is a self-exiled member of the clan who refuses to stay gone.
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