A Groksucker gets it wrong, continued

This post wraps up the superflous exercise I started this morning — exploding the latest antigay jibber-jabber from Judy at Granite Grok.
Amazingly, in the same post she opens with the uninspiring all-caps announcement that she’s never blogged about a more pressing issue, Judy — relating having witnessed in her churchy past the “deconversion” of numerous gays (a phenomenon no more verifiable than the exorcism of demons) — describes what a “miraculous experience” it is to “witness the freedom that comes when someone faces their particular truth about themselves and their upbringing and its influences, etc….only possible with God’s unconditional love and guidance.” That’s right; her idea of a miracle is seeing someone systematically browbeaten out of enjoying exactly the freedom that more people would enjoy were it not for that very godthing she mentions, an “entity” whose love is apparently “unconditional” under the condition that we all be heterosexual.
Similarly, she defends herself at length against the many charges she says have been leveled against her: racist, bigot, homophobe. Basically, her defense is: Uh-uh! She writes:

It doesn’t bother me to be called a bigoted homophobe, intolerant, or racist because they’re simply not true. I do have a spiritual conviction about homosexuality, and I don’t make any apologies for it.

Well, Judy, in that case, my rep notwithstanding, I haven’t used a single fucking epithet in this post, nor have I called your hopelessly ignorant ass any nasty names. I just have certain convictions about words and I won’t apologize for that. Now that was easy!
This line from Judy, in particular, is both revealing and a source of concern:

Homosexuality is not the equivalent of being born black which is unchangeable…well, unless perhaps you’re Michael Jackson, ha!

This is not only demonstrative of Judy’s general lack of wit, but also suggests she believes that if black people could unblacken themselves, then it would be incumbent upon them to do so. Maybe she’s just a poor analogist.
This all has me wondering what Judy and those who steadfastly maintain that homosexuality is a “sin” would do if confronted with absolute, unassailable evidence that homosexuality was one hundred percent determined at birth and could no more be changed than one’s ethnic background. According to the Bible, being gay would still be a sin and thus remain unacceptable. So now what? Does this mean God ensures that at least 5% of people are born with the guarantee of eventually spending eternity in Hell? Not that this is His only example of scatterbrained douchebaggery, but come on! Is it any wonder that these jackholes for Jesus will keep resisting the idea of wholly natural homosexuality? If they accept it, they’ll be virtually compelled to follow through on what Leviticus compels them to do and start agitating for the wholesale killing of queers. These damned religious bots are categorically destined to strangle on their own fabulous inconsistencies.
After this, Judy once again invites her interlocutors to go head-to-head with her on her comrade’s oft-referenced waste of AM bandwidth. This woman and Gribbit must have budded from the same amoebic biomass at some unfortunate point in recent hominid history, products of the same glop that has given rise to all of the other serial morons who, despite proclaiming a desire for quality discussion, fall remarkably silent when asked to support their assertions and the forum for this exercise is beyond their tight-fisted, small-minded, and eminently cowardly control.
Were there actually a loving god out there, people as evilly mindless as this wouldn’t be punished simply for being mindless, but they would all be born sterile. The kind of garbage they generate won’t be needed in the next generation or any of the ten, fifty, or one thousand that may follow after that if merciful aliens don’t slam-dunk the whole terrestrial freakshow into a mammoth asteroid or sling it stylishly into a cold, remote arm of the Milky Way galaxy.
Short version of the above: If it doesn’t involve you, Judy, then mind your own damned business. Just this once. Try it — it feels so good. (Please see Mark Chu-Carroll’s excellent and impassioned post on this very topic.)
Judy and the other human skidmarks at GraniteGrok think that I’m a raging liberal because I speak out against stupidity. I can actually give a number of examples of traditionally liberal viewpoints that are dumb as well, but in recent years, self-described far-right conservatives have taken idiocy to such an alarmingly profuse level that it’s become all but impossible to even take notice of gentler forms of foolishness. So, understand that I have no personal stake in assuring that homobigots don’t get their way, other than the gay friends I have (reason enough in my eyes) and the general and often grudging sense that even undiluted morons deserve every shred of societal privilege and compassion afforded to those who have always had it relatively easy. Whoever said “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it” (a follower of Voltaire, apparently) was dead nuts on. She knew there would always be armies of Judys out there, waiting to pounce on anything they can find to distract them from the sheer toil of waking up in a mongoloid’s head every morning and spending all day in its dim and scary corridors.
Actually, that extends to all of the grousing I and most god-free people have ever done about every religious intrusion into modern life, which can be encapsulated simply in a similar way, i.e., mind your own Goddamned business. Wasting hours each week worshipping and praying to things that aren’t there while evidence of the utter lack of cosmic meaning in life ricochets all around you is about the stupidest thing I can imagine doing, but you know what? I don’t care if people do this, as it costs me nothing in the way of liberty, happiness or property. I’m sure lots of people think training for and racing marathons is a fool’s errand and I don’t blame them, as long as none of them actually try to stop me. I don’t care if people want to jump stunt-bikes over a row of school buses or build sculptures of Ted Nugent out of human ejaculate even though I think these are also sketchy endeavors at some level. Spending hard-earned money on fancy but nonfunctional jewelry, Humvees, expensive homes in Hurricane Alley? Stoooo-pid. But so what? I’m too busy blogging about stupid people to give a single thought to what the morons among us are up to. It simply doesn’t register with me. (Well, you get the point.)
Now keep in mind that Judy is someone who likes what she sees of a presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee, who thinks that the Bible is a better source of scientific insight about life on earth than is a 21st-century biology textbook. What this means is that Judy is perfectly willing to align herself with someone who rejects what 99.99% of working life scientists believe about evolutionary science while simultaneously seeking out the few scientists convinced that gaiety is strictly a personal choice and quoting the for Chrissakes WorldNut Daily to bolster her views, as if that “publication” serves as anything other than a thrumming third rail of extremely stupid far-right belching and farting points.
As I’ve said before, people can take whatever unruly positions they want; I’m not interested in forcing people to like homosexuals, yellow Labs, and those who are sufficiently blessed to understand that skygods are senseless human constructs. But the manner in which the slack-jawed and the squint-eyed cherry-pick what they need is undeniable and indefensible. I’m not bothered by Judy’s distaste for gays, be it the result of a crash-cymbal assortment of shitty faerytales or because she harbors visceral disapproval of men touching other men below the waist. What’s problematic is her powering a quest to storm into to other people’s lives with a barrage of mistaken beliefs. Were I to suggest that the store up the street be forced to shut down because it sells country music and my psychic says that country music will soon be known to cause tympanic cancer, this would be no more an example of moral trespassing, no more ill-founded, and no less reasonable than shouting down faggotry.
One thing about people like this, though they don’t realize it, is that their hiding out on their own blogs and on radio shows no one gives a frig about means that their reach, while ugly to imagine in its full extent, is self-limiting. Judy can rave away all she likes and ask people to sign antihomo petitions and even cry for a literal rebellion, and in the meantime an unfortunately contempt-fomenting and antiprogressive era of culture she so deeply hopes to preserve continues to slide, albeit ponderously and amid much resistance, into the dustbin of human shame.
I’ve been trying not to cuss so much lately, but I was tempted to empty the magazine again this time, just to piss off the Groksuckers and watch them behave like Eddie Murphy’s stammering and deeply offended parody of Bill Cosby in Raw as they decide whether or not to link to this righteous but, I believe, fair-minded shitstream. If they do, they’ll ignore every point I made in favor of referring to the naughty words I use, because those words are not only all they’re willing to confront but all they seem to be able to understand. Whatever. At least I know I picked a deserving target.

6 thoughts on “A Groksucker gets it wrong, continued”

  1. This is not only demonstrative of Judy’s general lack of wit, but also suggests she believes that if black people could unblacken themselves, then it would be incumbent upon them to do so.

    Well, duh.

  2. I find reference to the term “tradition-based convictions” a bit chilling. How many types of outright bigotry could you cover with that inoffensive-sounding term?

  3. I’m glad you have something about that crazy post of hers. I wanted to respond on their site but thought it might give it too much credit. I had no idea there where these types of nutjobs in NH. If Judy was actually happy in her marriage, life and sexuality, she wouldn’t be so determined to try to change others.

  4. ooof.
    @Ex-Drone
    The Tradition based convictions got me too. The first thing that came to mind was the subjugation of women, which had we still relied on that “tradition based conviction” Judy wouldn’t have the forum she now has to spout her willfully ignorant faith based brand of scum flavored vitriol.
    Good job Judy at showing your self to not only be an intolerant hate filled “Christian” (why do you make the baby Jesus cry?) but to also be a historically ignorant and fantastically myopic jackass at the same time.

  5. Kev, you need to look into a mirror cuz black, gay or stupid….you doing what she doing. As Forest Gump once said, Stupid is as stupid does”. Yureeka!! I just found the stupid hole. Now let’s climb down in it. Wow! You guys are soooooo full of yourselves.

Comments are closed.

A Groksucker gets it wrong, continued

This post wraps up the superflous exercise I started this morning — exploding the latest antigay jibber-jabber from Judy at Granite Grok.
Amazingly, in the same post she opens with the uninspiring all-caps announcement that she’s never blogged about a more pressing issue, Judy — relating having witnessed in her churchy past the “deconversion” of numerous gays (a phenomenon no more verifiable than the exorcism of demons) — describes what a “miraculous experience” it is to “witness the freedom that comes when someone faces their particular truth about themselves and their upbringing and its influences, etc….only possible with God’s unconditional love and guidance.” That’s right; her idea of a miracle is seeing someone systematically browbeaten out of enjoying exactly the freedom that more people would enjoy were it not for that very godthing she mentions, an “entity” whose love is apparently “unconditional” under the condition that we all be heterosexual.
Similarly, she defends herself at length against the many charges she says have been leveled against her: racist, bigot, homophobe. Basically, her defense is: Uh-uh! She writes:

(more…)

6 thoughts on “A Groksucker gets it wrong, continued”

  1. This is not only demonstrative of Judy’s general lack of wit, but also suggests she believes that if black people could unblacken themselves, then it would be incumbent upon them to do so.

    Well, duh.

  2. I find reference to the term “tradition-based convictions” a bit chilling. How many types of outright bigotry could you cover with that inoffensive-sounding term?

  3. I’m glad you have something about that crazy post of hers. I wanted to respond on their site but thought it might give it too much credit. I had no idea there where these types of nutjobs in NH. If Judy was actually happy in her marriage, life and sexuality, she wouldn’t be so determined to try to change others.

  4. ooof.
    @Ex-Drone
    The Tradition based convictions got me too. The first thing that came to mind was the subjugation of women, which had we still relied on that “tradition based conviction” Judy wouldn’t have the forum she now has to spout her willfully ignorant faith based brand of scum flavored vitriol.
    Good job Judy at showing your self to not only be an intolerant hate filled “Christian” (why do you make the baby Jesus cry?) but to also be a historically ignorant and fantastically myopic jackass at the same time.

  5. Kev, you need to look into a mirror cuz black, gay or stupid….you doing what she doing. As Forest Gump once said, Stupid is as stupid does”. Yureeka!! I just found the stupid hole. Now let’s climb down in it. Wow! You guys are soooooo full of yourselves.

Comments are closed.

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