She was just a stupid bitch anyway: resentment in the face of powerlessness

Picture someone (perhaps yourself) in what seems like a stable, mutually gratifying romantic relationship. You know this guy thinks the world of his girlfriend, and happily accepts her imperfections because they are far outweighed by her positive attributes and her overall allure. Most of all, the guy has serious and solid hopes about the future…until one day, things fall apart for whatever reason. Be it a result of his girlfriend’s meeting someone else, her accepting a job in another state, or plain old whimsy, the guy finds himself dumped.
At first he’s just shell-shocked. He doesn’t know what to think and he’s fixated on both what-might-have-beens and, perversely, the high points of the union that was and is no more. But it isn’t long before creeping sullenness sets in. The guy seeks out companionship with friends who will support him unconditionally in whatever way seems appropriate. Intellect starts to meld with, or infect, raw emotion, and it’s not long before he might even be heard to say:
“She was just a fat stupid bitch anyway.”


Now this is outlandish on his face. People don’t fall and stay in love with people they believe are unattractive, dumb, or difficult to be around. But the guy is so deep in the jaws of savagely satisfying resentment that he may actually believe what he’s telling his buddies, who are all to happy to agree with him (or keep quiet if they see the process for what it is). He’s so awash in hurt on one side and powerless on the other that he has gone well beyond the rationalizing away of his previous feelings of affection and hope–a natural enough reaction–and actually has himself convinced that his ex is an evil character and that he’s only now coming to accept the truth.
This extended metaphor formed in my head during a run through the warming New Hampshire woods this afternoon. I’d read a letter to the editor in which yet another wounded voter was claiming that Obama had never supplied a real birth certificate and was therefore not a U.S. citizen. This commenter was so sure of this, in fact, that he supplied the claim parenthetically–the whole sentence was, “The US Constitution kept prayers out of classrooms but it failed to keep Obama (who was not born in the U.S.) from being our president,” which is obviously even worse.
I love how a bunch of muddle-headed and resentful Internet clowns think that they have been able to figure out something that every Republican in Congress has not. Do they really think that if there were any truth to this “not a citizen” meme, it somehow wouldn’t have been uncovered during the 2008 campaign by McCain staffers, investigative reporters, or others with a little more proximity to evidence than the average twit with an Internet connection and a beer can in his non-mouse-clicking hand?
Of course, many of these same people also say that Obama wants to literally destroy the United States; that he is a communist, a socialist, a Marxist, a terrorist, or some combination, that he is responsible for the economic mess the country is in, despite the fact that Bush was the president from 2001 to 2009 (and faced with this challenge they’ll claim that it’s really the congressional Dems who ruined everything in that period. Best of all, they will assert that Obama is, two months into his term, officially a categorical failure.
These are absurdities, and while the dumbest of the dumb may really believe such ideas, I think most of them stem from the same sort of resentment coupled to powerlessness I tried to illustrate with my jilted-lover example. They know they’re full of shit, but they’re so furious and aghast at Obama having won the election that they refuse to move past it. They see elections as wars rather than as means of selecting candidates who will hopefully govern with good intentions and treat their offices with respect. They’re patriots, but only when the right guy is leading the charge. They’re in love with their lady America and madly dry-hump the floor about what a great and powerful nation she is–except suddenly, now that a commulibtard is the president, America is actually a sneering, flabby-assed bitch with a harelip and halitosis. And was all along.
Guess what, folks. Your candidate lost. No, really. It wasn’t the MSM, it was the ballot box. So instead of a coke-snorting, self-interested redneck of privilege in the White House, there sits an articulate mixed-race man with manifest ideals. Live with it, and just be grateful that there’s no intelligence test as a voting requirement in this country. Obama won’t turn out to be perfect, and may not even turn out to be adequate, but the least people on the other side of the aisle can do if they’re not going to stand behind their own president is stop blathering well-discredited fiction about him. People who hated Bush mostly hated him precisely because they wanted a better nation, not because they cared about his political affiliation. Not so with this screaming mob, whose members clearly hate the fact that they can’t stop fantasizing an America that picked up and bolted for the horizon months ago.

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  1. #1 by Bill from Dover on March 20, 2009 - 6:58 pm


    People who hated Bush mostly hated him precisely because they wanted a better nation, not because they cared about his political affiliation.

    Bush gained my disrespect the old fashion way. He earned it!

  2. #2 by Paul Smith on March 20, 2009 - 7:04 pm

    Whatever; you keep defending your usurper and traitor as he totally destroys this country with his idiotic, failed, discredited and wrongheaded economic policies.
    While you play your word games, people around the country are waking up to the utter crap he and his cronies are spewing.
    DEFEND THIS!:
    Mar 18, 2009 – Bill Action
    Passed House: H.R. 1388: Generations Invigorating Volunteerism and Education Act Passed House 321-105, 6 not voting with 99% of Democrats supporting, 60% of Republicans opposing.
    Amendment actions:
    H.Amdt. 49 (Offered): Amendment (A012) offered by Mr. Miller, George.
    Amendment to prohibit organizations from attempting to influence legislation; organize or engage in protests, petitions, boycotts, or strikes; and assist, promote, or deter union organizing.
    H.Amdt. 49 (Vote): On agreeing to the Miller, George amendment (A012) Agreed to by voice vote.

  3. #3 by Kevin Beck on March 20, 2009 - 7:18 pm

    I wrote:
    “many of these same people also say that Obama wants to literally destroy the United States”
    And Paul Smith wrote:
    “you keep defending your usurper and traitor as he totally destroys this country”
    Thank you. I didn’t even ask for volunteers to confirm what I wrote, but you stepped right up. And by the way, shit-for-brains, I wasn’t defending a single one of Obama’s policies (if you believe otherwise, quote the relevant parts of my post).
    As for GIVE, you don’t explain what the problem is. I guess you’re left only with your blind claim about Obama’s “idiotic, failed, discredited and wrongheaded economic policies.”
    Go bang your rattle and wail at the ceiling somewhere else. Some of us are enjoying the first day of spring.

  4. #4 by Kevin Beck on March 20, 2009 - 7:18 pm

    I wrote:
    “many of these same people also say that Obama wants to literally destroy the United States”
    And Paul Smith wrote:
    “you keep defending your usurper and traitor as he totally destroys this country”
    Thank you. I didn’t even ask for volunteers to confirm what I wrote, but you stepped right up. And by the way, shit-for-brains, I wasn’t defending a single one of Obama’s policies (if you believe otherwise, quote the relevant parts of my post).
    As for GIVE, you don’t explain what the problem is. I guess you’re left only with your blind claim about Obama’s “idiotic, failed, discredited and wrongheaded economic policies.”
    Go bang your rattle and wail at the ceiling somewhere else. Some of us are enjoying the first day of spring.

  5. #5 by Kevin Beck on March 20, 2009 - 7:18 pm

    I wrote:
    “many of these same people also say that Obama wants to literally destroy the United States”
    And Paul Smith wrote:
    “you keep defending your usurper and traitor as he totally destroys this country”
    Thank you. I didn’t even ask for volunteers to confirm what I wrote, but you stepped right up. And by the way, shit-for-brains, I wasn’t defending a single one of Obama’s policies (if you believe otherwise, quote the relevant parts of my post).
    As for GIVE, you don’t explain what the problem is. I guess you’re left only with your blind claim about Obama’s “idiotic, failed, discredited and wrongheaded economic policies.”
    Go bang your rattle and wail at the ceiling somewhere else. Some of us are enjoying the first day of spring.

  6. #6 by abb3w on March 20, 2009 - 7:27 pm

    People don’t fall and stay in love with people they believe are unattractive, dumb, or difficult to be around.
    A inclination for regular fornication in a female does amazing things to some males’ ability to notice these details.

  7. #7 by kemibe on March 20, 2009 - 9:42 pm

    My analogy felt good while I was romping along a trail in the throes of an endorphin buzz, but it actually fails.
    The dumped boyfriend and the wingnuts are both imparting characteristics onto their objects of scorn that are not there. But while the boyfriend once adored the thing he’s now ripping into, the wingnuts never wanted the thing they’re hating on in the first place.
    So “post-resentment breakup syndrome” is a classic example of “sour grapes,” while whatever you want to call the wingnuts’ behavior is something else–some vague stew of red-herring logical fallacies (mostly appeal to emotion) driven by resentment and disillusionment.

  8. #8 by Adam C. Sieracki on March 21, 2009 - 4:32 pm

    MY Secret Obama Agenda theory:
    *The National Association of Broadcasters, furious over the Bush FCC’s whitespace decision, shovelled tens of millions into BO’s campaign, to ket this overturned. Obama’s FCC has stalled the switchover to digital, citing the ‘cost’–$400M. (And, yet, there’s money for a $700+ BILLION ‘stimulus package’…)
    *Other big spenders on the Obama campaign (AND inauguration), like Microsoft, will get some of that stimulus pork. Microsoft’s medical records programme is already pegged at over $20B. When you consider that Canada’s Firearms Registry, which was supposed to cost CDN$20M, ran up to almost TWO BILLION… (One of the Liberals corporate patrons was Honeywell, who got some of that porkbarrel contract.)
    *The media-telecom sector, not only funded Obama’s campaign, but helps propagandize The One in other ways. Having glitteratti endorse him (e.g., Beyoncé, Will.I.Am) is one. Pravdaesque ‘news’ coverage is another. Since when is a 52.5% win a “landslide” victory? That SNL skit, where Chris Matthews tells Obama that he masturbates to his speeches, is rather sadly more truth than jest.
    *The media automatically dismisses ANY questions re. Obama’s eligibility as ‘crazy racist right-wing birther tinfoil hat-wearing’ talk (often using some of these actual words). Yet, they had no qualms about reporting ILLEGALLY OBTAINED information about Joe the Plumber (who embarrassed The One, by asking a valid question).
    *Why is it that somebody as famous as BO, born a mullatto in early-’60s Hawaii, with a very memorable name, isn’t burned into ANYONE’S mind? Nobody has come forward with any cute “I remember baby Barack!” anecdotes–hospital staff, other mothers, ANYBODY. Why won’t BO or his relatives even give a straight answer to the question of what hospital he was born at? Why are the only people who seem to recall his birth in KENYA (the Kenyan government has slapped a gag order on them)?
    *As bizzare as it seems, there is no legislative requirment for a President[ial candidate] to prove his eligibility. The Bill Posey bill is the first. Also, quirky HI law allows persons born OUTSIDE Hawaii to be registered as having been born IN the state. Sun Yat Sen was recorded as ‘Hawaiian-born’, for example… The only proof of whether-or-not BO was actually Born in the USA is in the origional birth certificate. By releasing a photocopy of it (or having it scrutinized, a la John McCain), this could all be over. Yet he keeps fighting this in court. For somebody who was so candid about things like his cocaine use, this is very odd behavior.
    Yes, there are a lot of nutjobs out there. But a broken clock is still right, twice a day.

  9. #9 by Art on March 22, 2009 - 5:06 am

    Every major shock is met with the same sequence of mental attitudes that reject, deal with, then accept the change. I have watched friends dealing with losing jobs over a few weeks and myself dealing with a blow tire in a cold wet rain over half an hour. The process seems to be the same even if the depth of the emotion and duration of each step is shorter or longer.
    Kübler-Ross got it right. The general course is: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance.
    The claims about Obamas citizenship is a simple denial of his being the president. The claims he is a communist sent to destroy the nation is simply reframed anger.
    What form the coming bargaining, depression and acceptance take and the timing remains to be seen. The boys on the right have, for the most part, not gotten that far into their coping process.
    I’m hoping that the depression phase kicks in a few months before the mid-term election so the right stays home and sleeps a lot. It would be handy timing.

  10. #10 by hopper3011 on March 23, 2009 - 11:58 am

    So “post-resentment breakup syndrome” is a classic example of “sour grapes,” while whatever you want to call the wingnuts’ behavior is something else–some vague stew of red-herring logical fallacies (mostly appeal to emotion) driven by resentment and disillusionment.

    I think it’s called “being a sore loser.”

  11. #11 by hopper3011 on March 23, 2009 - 11:58 am

    So “post-resentment breakup syndrome” is a classic example of “sour grapes,” while whatever you want to call the wingnuts’ behavior is something else–some vague stew of red-herring logical fallacies (mostly appeal to emotion) driven by resentment and disillusionment.

    I think it’s called “being a sore loser.”

  12. #12 by H.R.I.M. on March 31, 2009 - 2:50 pm

    I don’t understand why the “teleprompter boy” doesn’t just give permission to the State of Hawaii to release his “vaulted” birth certificate. And why doesn’t this “penis with big ears” pick up the phone, and advise Columbia and Occidental to release his records?
    What’s wrong with this picture?
    I promise you that this community organizing piece of crap will never be my president. jms

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