From the “way past random” department: interesting tanning salon criticism

This page–found thanks to some of the more haphazard Web browsing I’ve done lately–can’t be nearly as funny as I think it is. But, not to go all Larry the Unamusing Cable Guy on people, it’s still funny.

Someone with the handle “AlottaFagina” is not happy with the way the owner of Sol Tans On The Hill in Colorado operates the place:

Sol Tans is a Total Rip Off, What a POS
by AlottaFagina

Hello, I have been tanning a Sol for years because of the $20 / month membership deal. If I could give them 0 stars I would. This summer they have had 5 + bulbs out in every bed in the salon and have done nothing to fix their beds or appease my complaints.

A lot of time employees won’t show up in the morning until an hour after they open.

The owner, Austin is a complete nincompoop. Not only has he tried to get several young girls I know intoxicated and sleep with them, but he has no idea what is going on at his salon and is a complete idiot when it comes to customer service.

Even his wireless network is called ‘hook up with Austin’.

If you want to be happy and treated right, don’t waste your time giving these losers money.


G Girl

* Pros: $20 / month
* Cons: Multiple Bulbs out in every bed and the staff is horrible

A review posted almost a year earlier is even better.

Horrible rude customer service
by Girl10101

The “employees” who “work” at this salon are a bunch of sorority girls who have never worked for anything a day in their life and are just “working” here to have a little extra spending money for partying and clothes and tan for free. Because of this, they treat any other customer who is not in their college “scene” like trash, and don’t understand the importance of money and how some people actually do care about 20 dollars, it’s not just “nothing”. A particular employee there was very rude to me when I explained I was moving and therefore could not use the 50 dollar credit left on my account, instead of offering some kind of trade (my money back,, free lotion or eyewear, SOMETHING) she just told me she would leave it on my account. What part of I’m MOVING do you not understand? If someone is MOVING that means that money on their account towards tanning is just going to sit there. Her parents are really wasting their money sending her to college because she’s completely brainless.

They have nice beds, but I frequently found that the beds were still dirty when i went in to tan, and there wasn’t a fresh towel. Their minutes are extremely expensive and their lotions are jacked up 100 percent or more of wholesale price. They sell a particular bottle there for $65 dollars, but you can get it off Amazon (the exact same thing) for 15 bucks!!!

My advice to the “owner”…. hire some employees who actually need the money and will treat your customers better. Those sorority girls may look nice, but they are hurting your business severely. I am in an industry where using tanning salons is the norm and will be sure to tell all of my coworkers to not use Sol tans on the hill because of your horrible service.

* Pros: nice tanning beds
* Cons: no parking, rude employees, dirty beds, ringworm

I have to chuckle at someone paying for fake UV rays emphasizing the importance of responsible financial behavior, but I think it was the reference to ringworm in the establishment that convinced me to post this.

2 thoughts on “From the “way past random” department: interesting tanning salon criticism”

  1. The UV rays are real. Why someone would pay for something that causes cancer, but doesn’t get you high, I have no idea.

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