I’ve never used online dating services and have no honest desire to do so now, but earlier today I impulsively created a profile on one of the more popular ones, just because the sun had risen in the east and I was therefore feeling a bit manic and mischievous. Here is how I described myself:
I’ve never tried online dating before, but I am assuredly the antithesis of a successful Match. com participant. I’m technically sane but volatile and unstable in several respects, and I balk at a gut level at the whole notion of a contrived, quasi-blind date. The fact that I’m friendly, engaging, both possess and appreciate a robust sense of humor, and am allegedly intelligent only makes things worse, because I make a great first impression that I subsequently prove unable to live up to. At any rate, I expect any adventures I have on this site to end in cataclysmic failure.
One less-than-surprising thing I’ve noticed in viewing the profiles of people I know is that users of these services–and in particular, men–are fond of exaggeration and outright misrepresentation of their skills, assets, strong points, whatever. Now comes someone whose desultory mini-bio reads as if it should be bullshit, but is in fact 100 percent sincere. I have no interest in using the site legitimately, and as a holder of a free account have a lot of limitations on functionality.
What is most entertaining is the idea that people will be directed toward my profile because the things I have posted there render them theoretically compatible with me. Who on a dating site would be a good match for someone who abhors dating sites? I guess it really is an open question.