Depravity: Secular Socialist

At the SRLC the other day, serial philanderer Newt Gingrich described President Obama as leading a “secular socialist machine”. It is a measure of the depravity of the Republican Party that calling someone both secular and a socialist is an effective means of denigration for the party faithful. Of course, it doesn’t matter that any reasonable analysis of President Obama’s stated positions would show him to be a centrist. For example, he did not support many typical liberal positions such as same-sex marriage and single-payer health care never even made it to the bargaining table. But for the 2010 GOP which happily embraces what we used to call “the lunatic fringe”, “socialism” is a word that is used to describe any policy that does not explicitly favor the Hoovering of the flaccid, diseased tool proffered by their porcine corporate masters. And as Frank Zappa once said “No one looks good wearing brown lipstick.”

Although I don’t agree that rampant capitalism is always the best show in town and the most effective and equitable way to do things, I can at least understand a person who makes an honest argument for it. Such is not the case for the “secular” tag. If someone is against secular government, then it must be fair in this case to assume that they’re for the opposite, namely a non-secular or religiously-based government. Small problem with that: The US Constitution. Apparently, these folks are so busy servicing the afore-mentioned pestilent appendages that they have forgotten that the Constitution clearly states that there shall be no religious tests for office. The apparent reality, though, is that certain self-proclaimed defenders of the Constitution would very much like to mandate that only a nice, (preferably white) god-fearing man need apply for the office of President.

And what would an SRLC event be without a little elite-bashing thrown into the pot? The Newt added that this so-called machine is made up of labor unions and “liberal tenured faculty”. Yeah. Damn those unions and no-good college and university professors. What have they ever done for us? “We don’t need no edukashun, good pay or workin’ condishuns.”

Newt = Pinhead.
Followers = Worse.

Author: jim

Jim is a college professor with a fondness for running shoes and drumsticks.