In doing some research for an “article” I happened across a treadmill with some impressive specifications. This monster has a deck 18 1/2 feet long and four feet wide, weighs more than a Humvee, can accommodate exercisers weighing over a ton, has a 40-HP motor, can be inclined to a 17 percent grade, and has a top speed of 60 miles an hour, about twice what Usain Bolt is capable of achieving. Of course, it’s intended to train horses, not humans, but what of it? Its price tag of $72,000 or higher should not be a deterrent to the folks at Jackass, a show for which this piece of equipment was seemingly invented. Come on, who wouldn’t want to see someone in a specialized suit dropped on to one of these things cranked up to top speed from a height of ten feet or so? Or buck naked?
Calling Johnny Knoxville!
- Dr. Joan Bushwell's Chimpanzee Refuge
What Hominids are Saying
Our Fossil Record
Popular Palaver & Polemics
- Fags eat poop
- Misanthropy and a fondness for animals: a connection?
- Evolution is a fraud perpetrated by Satan, Darwin, and the goddamned Freemasons
- Granite Grok remains a locus of mindlessness and bullshit
- Christians: Why should anyone believe ideas you plainly reject yourself?
- What emboldens a lunatic like Kim Duclos? More lunacy
E-Mail Threats Received to Date
- 175,750 nastygrams