In which I present possibly the most worthless “article” about running on the Web

I admit that I only found this captivatingly inane treatise on the evils of “jogging” because I decided to choose the title “How Jogging Can Be Bad For You” from the LIVESTRONG pile just to practice writing from the standpoint of borderline intellectual dishonesty. (People on debate squads apparently engage in similar endeavors routinely.) For all I know, the “author,” Jonathan Wong, was doing the same thing when he wrote the piece, in which he gives three basic reasons that jogging “does people no good”: It doesn’t help you look good, doesn’t help you in the “game” of life, and isn’t that great for your health. Reading only these three section headings is enough to assure anyone not in the throes of heavy-metal poisoning, an ether binge or organic mental compromise that the “writer” is either piss-ignorant or gleefully dishonest. Given his lack of command of English (note that he manages to misuse both “it’s” and “its,” which is pathognomonic for spurious content), I reckon he’s just a twit.

Some excerpts:

[M]ost joggers look tired, bored and unhappy … Their bodies look soft, jiggly and not particularly impressive … look at the people who have a jogging routine … Check them out 3 months or even 12 months later. Yup. Same look or even fatter!

Jogging does nothing more for fat loss than a good diet. Eating healthy is great for fat loss. Jogging adds NOTHING to it. Shocker!! This isn’t some 10 min a week either. Its 30-50 min 3 times a week! More than most joggers do.

Jogging does nothing for muscle gain. Jogging puts your entire body into “starvation mode”. The body thinks “I’m lost in the jungle that’s why I’m jogging so much to find my way out”. Whats the best way to survive in the jungle? It’s to use as few calories as possible so we can live off less food. How do we achieve that? You body commands it’s calorie using parts to be jettisoned. Only muscles use calories! Oops there go your fat burning, calorie using, nice looking muscles.

This is all from section one. All of section two is predicated on the ridiculous assumption that “joggers” don’t do any strength training — that it’s an either-or proposition. Even without this startlingly stupid premise, what Mr. Wong has written here is so fucked up that it fails to rise to the level of wrong.

The finale is perfect:

I hope joggers don’t take this article an a personal attack. I certainly don’t mean it that way. It’s just that in a fast paced culture (with so little time to exercise) and with the current levels of inactivity, obesity, and other lifestyle related health conditions, we cannot afford to do anything less than optimal training.

While this dumbass is obviously free to hold easy running in as low a regard as he likes, in condemning it he has made a number of factually inaccurate claims. Muscle tissue has a higher metabolic rate than does adipose tissue, but both are metabolically active. Running, even slowly, does not lead to a slower basal metabolic rate — if anything the opposite is true, although this effect is often overstated. He mentions a mysterious malady called “plantar faciatis.”

I got a laugh out of the “writer’s” claim that he enjoys getting all “science-nerd-geeky.” That’s like Manny Ramirez saying that he loves coming to bat without any illegal or banned drugs in his system. Sadly, this jackhole was probably paid to write this — a pittance, no doubt, but he should actually be fined for generating something so badly off base. And worse, this functionally illiterate myth-monger is a personal trainer. Fortunately he’s in Singapore so it’s doubtful that anyone stumbling across his heap of verbal horseshit stands much of a chance of unassumingly enlisting his services.

  1. #1 by jim on June 21, 2011 - 6:31 am

    “You(r) body commands it’s calorie using parts to be jettisoned. Only muscles use calories! Oops there go your fat burning, calorie using, nice looking muscles.”

    Oh, c’mon, that’s simply delicious in its (it’s) moronic simplicity!

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