Well, she managed to get booted from a forum specifically set aside for the full-throated tearing apart of other people. That qualifies as hilarious, even if Kim Duclos‘ intentions are always anything but funny.
I’ve finally accepted the most likely explanation for why Kim — last seen wandering the Meadows Plaza shopping center looking like about 170 pounds of shit jammed into a sandwich bag — refuses to stop lobbing turds in my direction, and why she persists despite her salvos not merely being ineffectual but clearly backfiring. (In addition to “Because she’s a fucking psychopath,” I mean. There are levels in play here.) The explanation I’ve come to terms with not only is unsettling, but also has become increasingly impossible to deny. I’ve tried to reject the whole idea despite compelling evidence in its favor. because it makes me literally nauseous, and I’m using the world “literally” with full command of the implications.
Kim has always been vicious to the women I’m close to because of garden-variety jealousy. She’s jealous of most women, but virulently angry at the women she knows or knows of with whom I’ve associated with me in a romantic way. (That ain’t a super-long list of women, in case you were in suspense about that.)
Numerous people have told me that this actually couldn’t have been more obvious from the very start, and they have laughed at my efforts to dismiss it. My own therapist has begun trying to persuade me of what she sees as plain-vanilla reality. I can now appreciate why, as I’m accepting that all of these people are correct. Why else would Kim harbor so much undisguised vitriol toward these women — who, by the way, never had a bad thing to say about Kim until she started in with this horseshit?
At any rate, it’s become undeniable. The facts are that Kim 1) doesn’t merely lie, but asserts the precise opposite of reality at every opportunity — I’m still not convinced this opposite-girl stuff doesn’t give her orgasms — and 2) has made repeated recent mention of how many times she supposedly “turned me down.” Taken together, these facts point at a conclusion is as clear as it is revolting, even in the absence of any knowledge of Kim’s attitude toward my lady-friends. I won’t explore it any more than I need to, which is to say that I would begin removing parts of my anatomy with a sharp implement before agreeing to have any “relations” with Kim Duclos for any amount of money. Hell, I don’t even think she’s any more capable of giving informed consent than a prize Holstein.
Anyway, enough background. Kim posted this on Reddit today:
This quickly expanded to:
That still wasn’t reeking sufficiently of unrestrained bullshit, so she bolstered the final paragraph:
Understand what’s happening here. Lize has been posting earnest responses to people in the same forum in which Kim’s been posing as an abuse victim…
(Stop to consider the full picture of this for a moment: A thieving, endlessly lying, drunken, terminally unemployable, cruel, proudly devious, insane moron who has no job and no prospects in life if her golden-showers-happy beau dumps her spends her days online ranting about suboptimal responses to her bullying attempts. Really, would you even bother getting up anymore if you were resigned to such an existence?)
…and now Kim, who has bashed Lize repeatedly over the years for no sane reason whatsoever, is pretending to be her advocate. Okay, she fucks up here and there. She’s somehow aware that Lize is posting in the same subreddit, but claims to have Lize blocked, so how would she know? And why would Kim have someone blocked whom she considered an abuse victim? I’m also thinking that “I could totally fuck with your job, but I won’t, because I’m your advocate! Let’s have tea! We’re soul sisters!” is shit that a remotely sane person would know not to write. And Kim is so goddamn dense that she forgets she’s supposed to be bitching that Lize is my victim, and starts complaining about the supposed misinformation I posted about her. (Stuff which, remember, doesn’t bother Kim one bit even though she mentions it constantly.)
Note that this is just the shit that anyone would likely notice. Never mind how fucking idiotic it looks to everyone who knows it’s Kim doing the posting.
Lize had a reply to this:
Kim’s comment is gone now, and she won’t be posting in that forum until she registers a new name, which should happen by, oh, yesterday. I don’t know the exact circumstances under which she and her post were removed from the forum, but she apparently decided to go off on the moderator. I do know that posting in the Narcissist Abuse subreddit is the most important element of Kim’s life at the moment. She won’t take this well if she had no say it it. She is a swine extraordinaire. As of Friday morning she was compensating by littering a variety of other subreddits with inanities and bullshit.
I’m sure this will continue in some form, even if I decide to let it go. Kim’s too fucked up to realize that she can still make things worse for herself even if her reputation, such as it is, won’t get any worse unless she actually kills someone.
I can understand why Kim sees herself as operating from a “nothing-to-lose” position, like a low-level political candidate with a rap sheet. Her dishonesty over the years hasn’t cost her any money or non-temporary employment (although showing up wasted cost her one of those quasi-jobs), because since I’ve known her, she hasn’t had either money or a job. It hasn’t ended her relationship with her current boyfriend, because theirs is a genuinely transactional “romance” in which each party is willing to ignore the other’s significant psychopathology to secure a need (Kim’s being basic sustenance, e.g., housing and food; Sean’s is a woman who will submit to some seriously fucked-up sexual practices, and I’m just going by her own statements on that one).
But it has still cost her. Even if Kim were physically capable of returning to the running world again, she rightfully fears being unable to because of the extensive documentation of her own erratic behavior, not the least of which is blindly denigrating some well-known coaches and programs (e.g., Brad Hudson, the Hansons group in Michigan). Anyone who Googles her name is immediately treated to the fact that, whatever one chooses to believe about the person writing my blog, Kim has lied endlessly about everything from her employment history to her academic record to other people’s behavior toward her and others. She has tried leveraging the rank sickness of her own mind to try to convince herself that all of this is just a he-said she-said matter, and that it looks like I’ve made up a lot of what I’ve said here. She knows no one, not even some putative moronic defender of her stance and claims, could really believe this. In short, she’s fucked herself, and she’s too compulsive to quit doing things to make her own present and future even worse.
Kim seems to forget just how much she confided in me over the years, and that I know full well that she operated from a basis of paralyzing anxiety. Kim hates the idea that people don’t like her, and guess what? Thanks to what she’s done to me and a lot of people I know, a lot of people in fact do despise her. She could never go back to Worcester for a visit with friends because she doesn’t have any friends there. She alienated a lot of people in the Central Mass Striders even before the bullshit I’ve documented reached the level of a court hearing, having accused a guy of cheating to place high in a race the guy didn’t even finish.
Kim can keep going with this, trying to win, insisting that I’m drunken criminal even though the few things she claims that are even remotely true date back years. Not only is Kim unquestionably far more immoral than I was on my most ambitiously backward day, but she is still making things worse — by the week and even by the day.
I know it’s not possible to fight crazy with sane, or crazy with funny, or crazy with contrived crazy. But it’s possible to send nutballs staggering off in directions they didn’t anticipate by swatting at them energetically enough. In my binge-drinking life as well as my booze-free one, I’ve seen a lot of people with mental disturbances. Some of these are manageable with enough effort, others all but disappear with cessation of drinking, and others are just an unfortunate and ineluctable component of personal neurobiology. Kim is never going to be anything other than an incoherent, lying, deluded, angry pile of shit. I can be angry too, especially at my own failures. But I obviously manage to surmount my foibles enough to keep up with work and other obligations I’d just as soon not have most of the time, hang out with a most excellent pooch, maintain close relationships with a few amazing people, and navigate the world in a way that allows me to leave most things better off than I find them. People like Kim, in my experience, hate themselves so much that at some point it becomes literally unbearable. Someone who despises reality so much that her lying about herself is literally boundless, and who envies her billions of betters to such an extreme that she only feels relief from the static in her head when she’s unjustly lambasting others, is destined for a short and deeply unhappy life. She can try to quell the psychic turmoil with booze, concerts, unpalatable meals. launching fictitious nonsense into cyberspace, and whatever other distractions she can find to try to quiet the voices muttering nasty ugly dumb helpless nasty ugly dumb helpless at her at every waking moment. But in the end, she’s fucked, and as far as I’m concerned, the sooner incurable assholes shuffle off this mortal coil for good, the better off billions of people are. I won’t miss her. (Since she says doesn’t read this, I can’t imagine that any of this will upset her.)