Christians: Why should anyone believe ideas you plainly reject yourself?

There are many compelling reasons to reject the idea that the Christian god is real. Most of these center, properly, on the lack of evidence for God and the undeniable and ever-growing body of evidence against innumerable biblical claims, while others encompass the inconsistencies and myriad logical contradictions within the Bible itself. More circumstantially, it’s impossible to not notice that some of the most ardent believers in the God of the Bible are either under the lash of mental illness, not very intelligent or both; the correlation between slack-jawed inbred yokelism and religiosity in the United States is practically unity. (This makes a certain sense, since the God of the Bible is a psychotically childish dipshit.) And it is undeniably true that no Christian who really believes that Christianity is about moral goodness could possibly support Donald Trump, and in fact should be calling for his death by stoning or whatever means is most convenient. Yet Christians are Trump’s most energetic supporters. They are a shitstain on American society and the world in general, and if all of them were swept up in a tsunami and dashed to pieces screaming against a rocky cliff, the rest of us would be vastly better off.

Often ignored in everyday evaluations of Christian nonsense, however, is the fact that the most ardent supporters of God, Evangelicals, clearly don’t believe in the God of the Bible themselves. Even if they did, it would be incumbent upon reasonable people to either ignore, deride or actively fight their incessant lunacy, depending on the circumstances. I won’t go so far as to say the world would be better off without belief in things that are demonstrably untrue, because, standing alone, fictional narratives (e.g., literature, films) can offer people a great deal of comfort in an uncaring universe. But the would be far better off without religion, and aggressive religious leaders of any faith should be met with proportional derision and their efforts opposed absolutely.

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Who’ll fund my hospital stay after I suffer a hernia from laughing?

(Edit, 12:42 a.m., Dec. 21: In a development that can only be seen as startling in the eyes of people dumb enough to fork over money to Brian Kolfage, he is evidently a lying sack of shit. I still think all of this is funny because I have no idea if those who donated to the cause will get a refund if the whole enterprise topples. I rather hope they don’t.)

I joked the other day about someone starting a GoFundMe campaign to empower private citizens, specifically fuckups, to fund the border wall. For a host of obvious logistical and political reasons, such a thing would be bursting with the potential for disaster and, thus, schadenfreude.

Therefore, shame on me for not immediately realizing that someone from Florida was already on it.

I went to high school with a guy who is also a triple amputee: His frontal lobe and both temporal lobes disappeared sometime between 1988 and 2016. He was making noises about doing this shortly after Trump took office it and slowly started to dawn on him, like a dog that has been basking in the smell of its own farts for years before the day it finally starts looking suspiciously at its own asshole, that maybe Mexico wasn’t as eager to pay for a border wall as Trump had promised.

The reasoning of the many, many fartbaskers just like this fellow now seems to be:

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I’ll huff and I’ll puff, and then I’ll retire to my bedroom and watch porn

Back in 2004, in the infancy of my own running-centric blogging but more or less at the apex of my overall online rabble-rousing, I was half-jokingly, half-admiringly accused by a friend of being the Rude Pundit, who was himself then part of a new vanguard of uncivil political bloggers. The Rude One was then anonymous, so I suppose it was possible. No matter what my friend — a prominent running author himself at the time — really believed, I was honored by the comparison. I suspect that the Rude Pundit composes his posts in just the same way I used to do my “Bill Eamick” shtick on Letsrun.com: Start by writing a coherent and tactful essay, and then weave in generous amounts of gratuitous profanity and obscene metaphors. Most readers view the result of such a process either a masterful remix or an appalling abandonment of decency. I of course see these as complementary aims, and where appropriate (and often where not), I have done my best to maintain this practice.

Today’s essay by the Rude Pundit takes on a popular idea: If Donald Trump is forced to leave office before his scheduled term ends, a significant fraction of his supernaturally loyal base will rise up in literal rebellion, rampaging about the countryside in an unrestrained show of righteous rage. (The Rude One offers his best gem in his opening sentence with “America’s tallest dipshit, former FBI director James Comey.” Yes, I enjoy life’s simpler pleasures.)

While Trump’s administrative removal from office seems unlikely (the odds that he will suffocate after his flapping jaws misdirect a burger morsel into his trachea appear greater), the notion that his slavish followers would risk anything of real value — be it their very lives or their local moonshine vendor’s Netflix login credentials — to oppose this event is preposterous. Read the rest of this entry »

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Adventures in courtroom lying, part 5: Kim Duclos really ought to vet her own stories

This is the fifth in a series of posts about a March 14, 2016 court hearing pertaining to reciprocal restraining orders Kim Duclos (now operating as “I_Code _to _Yacht_Rock” on Reddit) and I had recently petitioned for. In addition to lying to the police on Feb. 26, 2016 about a nonexistent episode of harassment to trigger this whole mess and lying on a restraining-order petition the following Monday (Feb. 29, 2016), Kim lied repeatedly before a judge in court at the hearing (I think there’s a word for that) and has been periodically lying about both the nature of the hearing itself and events addressed in the hearing. She has also continued to hector my friends as well as attempt to interfere with my personal and business life. Ergo, this series of posts, which will reveal even more forcefully what a sociopathic and malevolent liar Kim Duclos is.

Moreover, Kim Duclos is a criminal. Lying to the police, on court paperwork, and in a court hearing itself are crimes, especially when you do make up these stories to try to get someone in trouble. As you’ll see throughout these posts, Kim has the personal ethics of a starving, drunken hyena. I want to emphasize this because of Kim’s frantic and throaty insistence that I’m a dangerous scofflaw myself. 

The audio clips were generated using Audacity and taken from the official .TRM files supplied to me by Boulder District Court. The audio itself has not been altered in any way. The hearing took place from 1:21 p.m. to 3:39 p.m. MST.

In this portion of Kim’s testimony, she, having already gibbered her way through my fictional heckling of her from a truck on Feb. 26, 2016 and then stammered about a nonexistent foot pursuit of her on some unspecified date at about six months earlier, shifts her strategy from recounting events that were impossible for me to have been a part of to describing actions that no human being could realistically have perpetrated.

This four-minute, 16-second clip starts with Kim’s lawyer asking her about a supposed incident involving me swerving at her from a white Honda Civic, which I apparently did in August of 2015. (Between lying to the cops on 2/26/206 and lying on her court paperwork three days later, Kim apparently forgot the month in which this “happened.”) It ends with her claiming that I had already tried running her down on Baseline Road in Boulder six months before that, this time in the same gray truck that I supposedly again produced just for the purpose of bothering her one year later.

The germane portion of the police report, followed by the relevant parts of the court paperwork: Read the rest of this entry »

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Adventures in courtroom lying, part 4: Kim Duclos is extremely chill for a petrified person

This is the fourth in a series of posts about a March 14, 2016 court hearing pertaining to reciprocal restraining orders Kim Duclos (now operating as “I_Code _to _Yacht_Rock” on Reddit) and I had recently petitioned for. In addition to lying to the police on Feb. 26, 2016 about a nonexistent episode of harassment to trigger this whole mess and lying on a restraining-order petition the following Monday (Feb. 29, 2016), Kim lied repeatedly before a judge in court at the hearing (I think there’s a word for that) and has been periodically lying about both the nature of the hearing itself and events addressed in the hearing. She has also continued to hector my friends as well as attempt to interfere with my personal and business life. Ergo, this series of posts, which will reveal even more forcefully what a sociopathic and malevolent liar Kim Duclos is.

Moreover, Kim Duclos is a criminal. Lying to the police, on court paperwork, and in a court hearing itself are crimes, especially when you do make up these stories to try to get someone in trouble. As you’ll see throughout these posts, Kim has the personal ethics of a starving, drunken hyena. I want to emphasize this because of Kim’s frantic and throaty insistence that I’m a dangerous scofflaw myself. 

The audio clips were generated using Audacity and taken from the official .TRM files supplied to me by Boulder District Court. The audio itself has not been altered in any way. The hearing took place from 1:21 p.m. to 3:39 p.m. MST.

Today’s short (1-minute, 49-second) clip picks up the action where the last installment left off. In that gloriously incompetent example of seat-of-the-pants bullshitting, Kim stammered her way through a lie about me attacking her from a truck two weeks earlier. When you fill out a restraining-order petition, it invites you to describe not only the most recent incident that let you to seek the R.O., but as many other examples of your aggressor’s malfeasance as you can fit onto the page — hence this. Kim, who responds to unexpected opportunities to lie about things in roughly the same way ordinary people react to the prospect of a powerful orgasm, obligingly filled the paper with nonsense. Because she knew that everything she was writing wasn’t true, she probably kept details about these non-incidents to a minimum in an effort to look not so much credible but like less of a fabulist. It didn’t work, because she’s a fucking idiot with little imagination and even less composure.

This is the relevant accusation. The most striking thing is that Kim says this incident took place at least six months before the most recent one, yet despite supposedly being somewhere between terrified and troubled, she never reported it to the police or even blogged about it, and later couldn’t remember not only the date but even the month in which it took place.

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Adventures in courtroom lying, part 3: Kim Duclos tries to defend a demonstrably false allegation (audio)

This is the third in a series of posts about a March 14, 2016 court hearing pertaining to reciprocal restraining orders Kim Duclos (now operating as “I_Code _to _Yacht_Rock” on Reddit) and I had recently petitioned for. In addition to lying to the police on Feb. 26, 2016 about a nonexistent episode of harassment to trigger this whole mess and lying on a restraining-order petition the following Monday (Feb. 29, 2016), Kim lied repeatedly before a judge in court at the hearing (I think there’s a word for that) and has been periodically lying about both the nature of the hearing itself and events addressed in the hearing. She has also continued to hector my friends as well as attempt to interfere with my personal and business life. Ergo, this series of posts, which will reveal even more forcefully what a sociopathic and malevolent liar Kim Duclos is.

Moreover, Kim Duclos is a criminal. Lying to the police, on court paperwork, and in a court hearing itself are crimes, especially when you do make up these stories to try to get someone in trouble. As you’ll see throughout these posts, Kim has the personal ethics of a starving, drunken hyena. I want to emphasize this because of Kim’s frantic and throaty insistence that I’m a dangerous scofflaw myself. 

The audio clips were generated using Audacity and taken from the official .TRM files supplied to me by Boulder District Court. The audio itself has not been altered in any way. The hearing took place from 1:21 p.m. to 3:39 p.m. MST.

This installment features Kim Duclos trying to defend the bullshit claim that served as the ultimate catalyst for this court hearing: that on February 26, 2016, I harassed her from a gray pickup truck I was driving near her and her boyfriend Sean’s apartment in Boulder. I’ve covered this here, but listening to Kim — who starts every lie a few points in the hole because she’s too scatterbrained and dumb to fib skillfully — try to simultaneously prop up and desperately modify an obvious falsehood is an exercise any armchair psychologist or fan of schadenfreude should undertake.

In this pitiful shitburst, Kim offers two related but distinct lies: That someone heckled her from a truck while she was running, and that I was the one who did it. I know with 100 percent certainty that the second one is false and I would unhesitatingly bet my life and that of my own mother that the first one is, too. Unless you have mental problems of your own, you’ll soon understand why. Read the rest of this entry »

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Adventures in courtroom lying, part 2: Kim Duclos falsely accuses a runner of cheating (audio)

This is the second in a series of posts about a March 14, 2016 court hearing pertaining to reciprocal restraining orders Kim Duclos (now operating as “I_Code _to _Yacht_Rock” on Reddit) and I had recently petitioned for. In addition to lying to the police on Feb. 26, 2016 about a nonexistent episode of harassment to trigger this whole mess and lying on a restraining-order petition the following Monday (Feb. 29, 2016), Kim lied repeatedly before a judge in court at the hearing (I think there’s a word for that) and has been periodically lying about both the nature of the hearing itself and events addressed in the hearing. She has also continued to hector my friends as well as attempt to interfere with my personal and business life. Ergo, this series of posts, which will reveal even more forcefully what a sociopathic and malevolent liar Kim Duclos is.

Moreover, Kim Duclos is a criminal. Lying to the police, on court paperwork, and in a court hearing itself are crimes, especially when you do make up these stories to try to get someone in trouble. As you’ll see throughout these posts, Kim has the personal ethics of a starving, drunken hyena. I want to emphasize this because of Kim’s frantic and throaty insistence that I’m a dangerous scofflaw myself. 

The audio clips were generated using Audacity and taken from the official .TRM files supplied to me by Boulder District Court. The audio itself has not been altered in any way. The hearing took place from 1:21 p.m. to 3:39 p.m. MST.

This picks up where the last installment left off, a little over halfway through the proceeding.

Because Kim Duclos is saddled a with very low level of social awareness, leaving her unable to perceive how her words and actions look to normal people, she made some strange choices in terms of what to present to the court to show that I was supposedly harassing her. Even less helpful were her attempts to refute allegations that she herself was a shit-stirring, lying loon. One of these was was her attempt to explain my website reference to her accusing a New Hampshire runner who was one of my teammates in my CMS days of cheating to win a race that he didn’t even finish. Here are the results.

The link in this passage goes to a screen shot of the public Facebook conversation, which occurred almost a year before Kim’s and my court appearance and was forwarded to me in real time by one of the numerous parties who were already aware of her aggressively off-kilter ways.

At the start of today’s episode of How Do People Get This Fucked Up and Shitty?, an Exhibit 11 was newly under discussion. This item was part of a packet prepared by Kim’s lawyer, who was late to the hearing and came across as some combination of dumb, unmotivated, and under-prepared. The two of them had not actually met before the hearing; I discovered during the proceedings that Kim had e-mailed him a bunch of stuff and he’d entered it all into the record without, in many cases, even knowing why it was there.

Exhibit 11 included a capture of a Facebook message I had recently sent to a quasi-friend of Kim’s (they’re not friends now) plus the screen shot noted above. I’ve magnified that screen shot by breaking it into chunks here. Read the rest of this entry »

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Adventures in courtroom lying, part 1: Kim Duclos dissembles about our “relationship” (audio)

This is the first in a series of posts about a March 14, 2016 court hearing pertaining to reciprocal restraining orders Kim Duclos (now operating as “I_Code _to _Yacht_Rock” on Reddit) and I had recently petitioned for. In addition to lying to the police on Feb. 26, 2016 about a nonexistent episode of harassment to trigger this whole mess and lying on a restraining-order petition the following Monday (Feb. 29, 2016), Kim lied repeatedly before a judge in court at the hearing (I think there’s a word for that) and has been periodically lying about both the nature of the hearing itself and events addressed in the hearing. She has also continued to hector my friends as well as attempt to interfere with my personal and business life. Ergo, this series of posts, which will reveal even more forcefully what a sociopathic and malevolent liar Kim Duclos is.

Moreover, Kim Duclos is a criminal. Lying to the police, on court paperwork, and in a court hearing itself are crimes, especially when you do make up these stories to try to get someone in trouble. As you’ll see throughout these posts, Kim has the personal ethics of a starving, drunken hyena. I want to emphasize this because of Kim’s frantic and throaty insistence that I’m a dangerous scofflaw myself. 

The audio clips were generated using Audacity and taken from the official .TRM files supplied to me by Boulder District Court. The audio itself has not been altered in any way. The hearing took place from 1:21 p.m. to 3:39 p.m. MST.

I’m starting in the middle because overall, this makes the most sense. This clip starts at 2:40 p.m., about halfway through the entire charade. Here, Kim’s lawyer asks her to explain what kicked off our coach-athlete relationship.

Before giving this a listen, bear in mind that Kim at various times since this court proceeding has declared that I never coached her at all. Here’s one example, an e-mail she sent to USATF-New England in early June of this year.

This message, sent in reference to an interview Kim gave without my knowledge in December 2009 or January 2010, actually includes numerous lies, at least one of which could get her sued. But for now, focus on the “I have never had any connection to Beck” part, which is ludicrous even by the standards of Kim’s unrestrained dissembling. This is someone who has repeatedly referred to me as an abusive coach, a drunken coach, a failed coach, et cetera (and by the way, we’ve only been in the same room three times not including this court appearance, never alone and never when anyone was drinking, unless Kim herself was sneaking a few nips).

In this 3-minute, 37-second MP3 clip, Kim gives her version of events. I will describe what she says and intersperse commentary, but will reserve my most pointed editorializing until the end of the post. Read the rest of this entry »

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The limitless extent of Kim Duclos’ dark obsession, and why this “fight” is asymmetrical

I’ll cheerfully admit that I waste a lot of time writing about a person who, in addition to being uncommonly malicious and motivated by imaginary offenses against her, is clearly disturbed. She isn’t likely to curb her behavior as long as she has a man with particular sexual tastes providing her with food, lodging and Internet access. She has very little to lose by continuing to wage war against facts, decency, and reality itself; as she is well aware but would never admit, it’s not as if she has, or ever will have, a professional reputation to protect, and everyone who is familiar with her has known for a long time that she is somewhere between vaguely antisocial at best and the kind of person you’d never want young children or even pets around at worst. Since I’ve started blogging about her, a few people in her former running club in Central Massachusetts have shared with me impressions they had of her without knowing her especially well, and have assured me that, while the things I’ve described in the past 2 1/2 years on my blogs and website have been eyebrow-raising in scope, none of her actions toward me are especially surprising in light of what these observers already perceived. In short, Kim has always been a jabbering fuckup, and it’s not as if she could hide this even if she wanted to.

One might make the argument (though to my knowledge no one has done so) that I’m just pouring gasoline on a tire fire by continuing to deride her here and on Twitter. But the undeniable reality is that Kim rants about me even when she doesn’t think I’m watching. Even ignoring the fact that she started all of this shit almost five years ago merely because I fired her as a non-paying, non-training coaching client who only wanted to use me as an audience-of-one for her ranting about her boy-problems and her struggles with drinking, this is not a symmetrical dispute. This is because, simply put, when Kim shuts up, I quickly start to forget she’s even out there even though her unseemly carcass is planted only a mile or so from where I live. I do, unlike Kim, have work to do, friends to see, hobbies other than online trolling to pursue, and a beautiful dog to spoil. Kim, in contrast, has been lying and complaining about me without pause since she moved to Boulder toward the end of 2014 — a move I’d bet my life savings would never had happened if I hadn’t already been living there myself.

For example, having worn out her welcome on various running forums long ago, she took to Reddit in 2017 and started in with her shit about me there. Again, remember that she didn’t think at the time I would ever see this stuff. (In a few cases, she was almost right, but I have friends in Boulder who read Reddit when they feel like surveying what the Internet’s anonymous trolling forces are up to, and Kim’s electronic ass-prints are unmistakable when you’ve had any exposure to her manic, disjointed rambling and the things she can’t help but mention.)

Again, please keep in mind my main point here as you read. Yeah, it may look like a case of he-said-she-said on the surface, especially if you don’t know the whole backstory (though no one I’m aware of has suggested as much). But not once have I posted about Kim spontaneously, or merely because it occurred to me that she’s probably sitting around being a piece of shit because that’s what she’s always been and all she’s capable of being. Everything I’ve written has been a reaction to some kind of bullshit she’s lobbed onto the Internet, or an e-mail she’s sent to spread lies about me.

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On how many fronts is Kim Duclos hilarious?

Well, she managed to get booted from a forum specifically set aside for the full-throated tearing apart of other people. That qualifies as hilarious, even if Kim Duclos‘ intentions are always anything but funny.

I’ve finally accepted the most likely explanation for why Kim — last seen wandering the Meadows Plaza shopping center looking like about 170 pounds of shit jammed into a sandwich bag — refuses to stop lobbing turds in my direction, and why she persists despite her salvos not merely being ineffectual but clearly backfiring. (In addition to “Because she’s a fucking psychopath,” I mean. There are levels in play here.)  The explanation I’ve come to terms with not only is unsettling, but also has become increasingly impossible to deny. I’ve tried to reject the whole idea despite compelling evidence in its favor. because it makes me literally nauseous, and I’m using the world “literally” with full command of the implications.

Kim has always been vicious to the women I’m close to because of garden-variety jealousy. She’s jealous of most women, but virulently angry at the women she knows or knows of with whom I’ve associated with me in a romantic way. (That ain’t a super-long list of women, in case you were in suspense about that.)

Numerous people have told me that this actually couldn’t have been more obvious from the very start, and they have laughed at my efforts to dismiss it. My own therapist has begun trying to persuade me of what she sees as plain-vanilla reality. I can now appreciate why, as I’m accepting that all of these people are correct. Why else would Kim harbor so much undisguised vitriol toward these women — who, by the way, never had a bad thing to say about Kim until she started in with this horseshit?

At any rate, it’s become undeniable. The facts are that Kim 1) doesn’t merely lie, but asserts the precise opposite of reality at every opportunity — I’m still not convinced this opposite-girl stuff doesn’t give her orgasms — and 2) has made repeated recent mention of how many times she supposedly “turned me down.” Taken together, these facts point at a conclusion is as clear as it is revolting, even in the absence of any knowledge of Kim’s attitude toward my lady-friends. I won’t explore it any more than I need to, which is to say that I would begin removing parts of my anatomy with a sharp implement before agreeing to have any “relations” with Kim Duclos for any amount of money. Hell, I don’t even think she’s any more capable of giving informed consent than a prize Holstein.

Anyway, enough background. Kim posted this on Reddit today:

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Not quite making history (or its channel), and an asshole sounds off again

In May 2017, I was contacted via Facebook Messenger by a television producer from the Pilgrim Media Group about being in a prospective History Channel documentary about the 1986 Space Shuttle Challenger disaster, which killed a teacher at my high school along with six other astronauts. The producer had found my posts on this blog from 2007 (aggregated here) and assumed, correctly, that I would be willing to appear in the documentary, assuming it was in fact produced.

We spoke on the phone for over an hour. Despite how often I have revisited January 28, 1986 in the past 32-plus years, I found myself far more expansive and animated at times than I ever expected to be, as well experiencing a wider and more potent array of emotions. As it happens, writing about something is not nearly as evocative of memories and feelings as is discussing it, even on the phone and even with a stranger.

Unfortunately, as happens so often in the TV business, the documentary – which would have aired on Jan. 28, 2018, the 32nd anniversary of the disaster – was never made, and as a result I obviously didn’t appear in it.


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Desperate measures

Kim Duclos wrote stuff.

SUMMARY

Paragraph 1: Kim, with an astonishing lack of comprehension of how insane her output appears even to a Kim-naive observer, tries to convince herself that none of what I’ve written about her bothers her, that no one who reads the stuff believes it, and that she has allies in her fight against “abuse.”

Paragraph 2: Kim — a social recluse who has no contacts in Boulder I know of and probably none that I don’t — invents a local ally who sympathizes with her, doesn’t like me, and has the influence to limit my social contacts. This is one of her recurrent themes: She doesn’t have any friends besides Sean, who is really more of a caregiver than a boyfriend to Kim, so she overreaches by a factor of about 50 in trying to portray herself as having defenders.

Paragraph 3: Another reiteration of “He doesn’t bother me or interfere with my amazing life at all, so I’m just gonna rant every day about him until he stops.”

FIGURE 1: A crazy mofo is on another determined Reddit roll Read the rest of this entry »

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Kim Duclos tells stories…and may actually be dangerous

Kim Duclos, a flagrant liar and shitbag who takes exception to being called a lying bag of shit, doesn’t like it when people make fun of the absurdities she posts to Reddit, the one place she feels safe spinning and spouting angry fictions about leading an amazing life despite the devious ways of her loathsome adversaries. She’s used no fewer than seven Reddit handles in the last year: duclok2, i_climb_rocks_a_lot, Kitty_BunBuns_, HungryBuffsDriver, Legal_Throwaway34, Literal_Crap_Bag, and iCodeToYachtRock. She used duclok2 to lie about her academic history, whereas she’s dedicated the others almost entirely to posting lies about me and my friends.

She has recently settled exclusively on iCodeToYachtRock even though she knows I and my friends are having a field day on Twitter with the garbled-ass nonsense she catapults into Reddit-space using that moniker. For a while, I, not knowing what it’s like to inhabit the mind of a mentally troubled moron, couldn’t help but wonder why she didn’t at least create yet another handle so that she could try to fly under the radar for a while. But because of my inexperience at being a worthless loon, I had it all wrong. You see, it doesn’t bother Kim that no one actually cares about her fables, or that any discerning person who reads her posts even without any foreknowledge of her antics can immediately see that she’s both full of shit and utterly bonkers. All that matters to Kim is that she gets to say something dishonest on the Internet and it won’t be deleted as long as she doesn’t name names.

This is basically the life Kim has settled into for good: Get online every day and courageously continue to craft a life that bears little relationship to reality, and blame every single one of the many things she’s fucked up on someone or something else. She is the epitome of someone who has absolutely no worthwhile purpose except for playing out the string until the lights blessedly go out for good (more on the dire implications of this later in the post). Read the rest of this entry »

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Kim Duclos very stalkerishly describes tracking an imaginary stalker

(TL;DR version: Is my own life imitating my own art? I’m tempted to call the cops to tell them that an established nutbag who lives a mile from me is chasing me around with a camera and claiming this is evidence of me stalking her.)

Kim Duclos, having given up last spring on posting her delusional output under her own name, has found what she feels is a comfortable enough home in the one Internet wildfire where no one gives a fuck if you’re lying, and where outrageous bullshit is in fact widely encouraged: Reddit. Absent anything better to do when her carcass isn’t being trundled to edifying events like Burning Man or death-metal concerts, she frequents an impressive range of subreddits, usually but not always under the handle “iCodeToYachtRock.” Here, her efforts to pose as an authority on the topic at hand are unintentionally hilarious thanks to her constitutional inability to perceive how her garbled rambling presents to people who are actually knowledgeable about these topics.

While Kim’s attempts to impersonate a future computer-science doctoral student and someone with a current programming job are good theater, she has so far reserved her best work for the subreddit called “Narcissist Abuse,” where people who believe that they have been traumatized by dangerous, self-absorbed people post like dangerously self-absorbed lunatics. Okay, not all of them do, but it’s fair to say that after a certain point, if you think your ex is a total narcissist, you might want to ask why you’re on an Internet forum complaining vociferously about his or her supposed fixation on you. And I’m probably being unfair to some real abuse victims by lumping them into the same category as Kim, whose only experience with a narcissistic mind is the feeble one trapped inside her thick skull.

Check out this thread. The original poster’s situation is irrelevant to Kim, because she just uses the presumably real pain and grief of others as a springboard to launch into her own lies, being, you know, not just a flamboyant liar but a grade-A fucking narcissist.

I really don’t think exhaustive table-setting is required to convince anyone that sane people do not churn words and phrases and ideas like this.  Read the rest of this entry »

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A solemn anniversary

A year ago today, Kim Duclos had a classic meltdown. She had just learned that Lize, Brad and I had co-written a book called “Young Runners at the Top” and had given a public talk about the book at the Boulder Bookstore five days earlier. Kim, whose already lackluster life stalled completely when she gave up serious running before she was even 30 and has been going in reverse ever since, absolutely couldn’t abide by people she likes to trash for no good reason being recognized in a positive way, so she did one of the few things that affords her a special-needs adult’s equivalent of sexual gratification and took to Letsrun.com for another classic rampage.

I’m not sure what her initial post consisted of because the Letsrun mods — who, while unconcerned with shitflinging on that message board in general, have been wise to Kim Duclos’s bullshit for years — deleted it before I or anyone I know could spot and collect it. But a friend diligently began capturing the inevitable HOW DARE YOU DELETE THE FUCKING LIES I POST HERE, YOU DICKWADS outbursts that followed. Read the rest of this entry »

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Five in eight Americans can now identify thermonuclear-scale bullshit as bullshit

Pro-reason Americans can, I suppose, take solace in the 38% figure being the lowest in the 36-year-history of this poll from May 2017.

I take a perhaps more cynical view: Three in eight adult Americans subscribe to an obvious fairy tale (this poll isn’t about belief in god but in the Christian creation myth specifically). Another three in ten believe that “God” somehow “guided” this process, an idea that, while unsupported, is not flat-out stupid like creationism.

This wouldn’t be so bad if creationists didn’t try to push this nonsense into public schools with the unrelenting ferocity of starving termites, but if there’s one thing Evangelicals as a rule can do notoriously well, it’s behave very aggressively as if they don’t have anything resembling fully developed human brains inside their skulls. Read the rest of this entry »

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“Stupid is as stupid does” still evades smart people

Remember the scene in Forrest Gump where the title character finally decided to end his impromptu cross-country run, and his band of followers expected him to say something profound? And when he didn’t, they behaved as if he had anyway?

Forrest Gump had a heart of gold, but he was a garden-variety idiot. He was not naturally inclined toward philosophical profundity, but even had he been, he would have found himself incapable of it. His look of perpetual confusion was not an affectation. The only reason people believed he should express deep wisdom is because he was likable, physically gifted, kind, and found himself in a variety of extraordinary situations.

Remember the wisdom of director Robert Zemeckis the next time you or another pundit is trying to parse Donald Trump’s “deeper strategy.” Plenty of people who should know better continue to try to impart far-reaching meanings to his statements and actions, not because a single thing about them invites such an analysis but because he was elected President and must therefore possess some genius qualities, however occult. “A true halfwit could never have made it this far,” some of his detractors protest. (His fans think he’s smart as fuck, but that’s a given.) Read the rest of this entry »

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It’s time for Kim Duclos to quit lying about being an abuse victim (audio, anyone?)

Kim Duclos is never going to stop lying, any more than any other addict will quit indulging in a free and ubiquitous vice. She once declared to a good friend of mine, who’d been nice enough to let her room with her in Indiana, “I lie because it gets me what I want.” This was not long before she fled town owing my friend rent money and adding her to the interminable list of people she despises for no reason besides basic jealousy. The fact that Kim has undeniably reaped a great deal of pain from her dissembling habit, and has arguably ruined her own life beyond repair in the process, isn’t even on her radar, because she refuses to connect the dots between her own behavior and its negative consequences.

And really, watching her lie about her accomplishments and skills under various handles on Reddit (at least seven in the past eight or so months alone) is kind of funny. Reddit is a giant oozing anal wart of bullshit, anonymity, and resentment, making  it a perfect landing spot for her insatiable need to not only create an alternate reality, but publicize the details. When she burbles on with great confidence about things she knows next to nothing about, it’s like watching an oblivious character in a Judd Apatow or Coen Brothers film go on about his own panache and greatness even while the rest of the cast guffaws or gawks in horror. She’s back to pretending she has a full-time job in a tech field while pursuing the computer-science degree she’s been lying about chasing for close to four years now, all while not understanding or caring how the totality of her own comments across subreddits torpedoes her various claims — even in a shithole like Reddit where no one cares what you’ve supposedly done because so many others are also lying. She can prate on all she wants about the fictional existence she’s crafted in defiance of the reality that she’s a pissed-off stay-at-home toper and layabout who stands no chance of becoming an engineer; that’s her business and it doesn’t really hurt anyone else.

But, of course, most of her online flailing about is not so benign. She hasn’t stopped trying to interfere with my life in the exquisitely petty way of the powerless moron. She monitor my online tiffs with other drones and quietly gets involved, she tries to dissuade business entities from working with me, and she even attempted to get my website taken down because I have, you know, factual information posted about her there. This is all just in 2018.

Now there’s this beaut last from night Read the rest of this entry »

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Most habitual liars aren’t trying to convince *you* of anything

I’ve recently been watching someone use Reddit, the world’s largest and deepest online swamp of anonymous jibber-jabber, as a vehicle to propagate fantasy life but two (in one of them, she is supernaturally well adjusted, hands out advice no legitimate adviser would, and is a flagrant know-it-all; in the other, she’s a recently terminated drunken construction worker who only a few months ago was a luxury condo developer in the Boulder area).

Living under the illusion of being more accomplished, more loved and admired, more generous, more intelligent, more knowledgeable, and more goal-oriented than one actually is might be an amazing way to live if it were possible to maintain it. I suspect that many of us often rewind the tapes of our lives to some critical point, substitute a great outcome for the poor one that actually happened, and play the tape forward to the present just to imagine how things might be were it not for that one possibly awful choice or event. But most people aren’t loopy enough to transform “might-have-beens” or pipe dreams into online resumes or other fictitious accomplishments, because when people try to interface with the world as someone they’re not, the world tends to offer resistance.

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The U.S. President would call himself a giant pussy if he were his own foul twin

The U.S. President is an undisguised coward as well as vindictive and just plain infantile. It’s not enough that he can simply ignore questions reporters ask him, jowls askew in flustered agitation; he has to try to prevent the asking part, too.

This manifests in his schedule of rallies, too. He will only address crowds in abject Trumpist shitholes in places like West Virginia, Tennessee and Montana. These habits, combined with his conducting a “presidency” from behind Twitter, make him no different from every workaday right-wing blogger; they ban, block and delete all dissent, however civil, and can’t even be bothered to bullshit after a certain point — they merely hide.

Hopefully, when he finally kicks it, his unseemly carcass will be placed in a dunking booth filled with piss and shit and people can take turns wandering by and trying to hit the target from a reasonable distance, like ten feet. After every successful dunking, the carcass will be dutifully retrieved and returned to the booth seat for another round. After a few weeks and millions of happy dunkings, the mess and the stench will be sufficient to warrant moving on to the next step: a giant funeral pyre at a Superfund site somewhere in New Jersey.

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